In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's there are few.

- Shunryu Suzuki

By Gordon Collins
The Coaching Network

How much of the work that you do takes place in conversations? Face to face, written communications, e-mails, etc. On a daily basis we are engaged in conversations - helping others in their planning, setting direction and goals, providing feedback, making decisions, solving problems, etc. At the same time as leaders and managers we have been through many of these conversations before and through experience and learning we have built confidence in ourselves, in particular in our knowledge and expertise.

Being an expert can be quite attractive. Our expertise is also a source of satisfaction for us. We often equate the value we bring to our role with our expertise. People often come to us with an expectation that we will use our expertise to help them with their questions, problems and decisions. We are often acknowledged and rewarded for being an expert. In some cases we identify so strongly with our expertise that we might actually say that we are our expertise!

So far so good! Our expertise is an important and legitimate asset, however there is also a shadow side to our expertise. Early in my career I had a manager who was strongly identified with his knowledge, opinion and expertise. We used to joke that he was an answer waiting for a question - and most of the time he didn't even wait for the question! Behind this joke was a real desire on my part to contribute my ideas and opinions. Granted, I was inexperienced and thought I knew more than I actually did, but the experience of having someone imposing their expertise on me left an indelible impression. On the surface I felt appreciative that the problem got solved or the decision that was made, but over time a kind of resentment built up. Why didn't he ask for my opinion more often? Didn't he think that I had good ideas or insight? When I offered suggestions or expressed reservations about a course of action, why did I feel marginalized rather than a valued contributor? There are unintended consequences of managers and leaders who over rely on their expertise and miss the opportunity to fully engage the hearts and minds of their people.

The intention here is not in any way to devalue expertise, but to point out a potential blind spot in its overuse and to reveal a complementary insight and practice called The Power of Not Knowing.

When we over rely on what we already know we can fall into an automatic mode of operating. Our attention relaxes, as we already know where the conversation is going - what the right answer is. We can easily slip into listening to our own internal dialogue, confirming and strengthening what we already know and perhaps making judgements about our conversation partner or looking for the right moment to make our point. It is also important to notice the role our emotional state plays in this situation. Our comfort and confidence are often tightly coupled with our competence (what we know and what we do). This 'good feeling' that comes from the coherence of our comfort, confidence and competence often produces an attitude of certainty, and certainty is not conducive to openness, genuine interest and the spirit of inquiry.

By contrast, being in a state of not knowing is initially emotionally unsettling. We have left the comfort and familiarity of the known behind and stand facing the emerging moment without our familiar security. How will we respond? Will we retreat to the known, the familiar or will we step forward into the unknown, into the possible? Being in a state of not knowing is not denying our knowledge, experience and expertise, but utilizing it in a new way.

Our expertise is still there, however it is in the background, available to us but held in reserve. By holding back on providing an answer to their question or the solution to their problem we are actually encouraging two important developments. First, we are giving our conversational partners an opportunity to both develop and express themselves, to extend their thinking or logic to the point where it 'breaks down' which allows them a moment of insight or the possibility of their true question to emerge. Second, we are developing our own power of restraint and in so doing allowing our self to develop a sense of timing! This ability to sense or create the learning moment in the conversation and intervene appropriately is the essence of 'timing'.

We are not leading the conversation from what we already know but rather we are leading by focusing our attention outwardly on the person we are speaking to, listening authentically to the meaning of what they are trying to articulate and encouraging them to take the next step in their development. We are replacing 'being the expert' with 'being present'. Our expertise is more likely to emerge as a question, a non-verbal reinforcement or a challenge to consider a different perspective, than as a statement or directive about what to do or how to do it. This is a dynamic process we are engaging in as we strive to find our edge. In the process we will be continually oscillating between finding our edge, losing it and then regaining it again.

The intent of this paper is to encourage and challenge the reader to expand their repertoire. To make a conscious decision about when they should lead with their expertise and when to lead out of 'Not Knowing'. The Power of Not Knowing is revealed in the outcomes achieved both for us and for our conversation partners. This approach pioneers a new social form which can be characterized by conversations that encourage collaborative thinking (How come I can think new thoughts in conversation with you that I don't think on my own?), emotional risk taking (I really should know this, but…/What if I don't know what to say next?) and the courage to commit to bold action (despite the butterflies in my stomach!)